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By TOPHER KALEN, aka THE RPS GUY
Sully Sneed, a local citizen of the realm granted himself badass status over the weekend. Once the admin assistant of the Mage's Guild he has transformed himself into the Guild Master in only two days time, becoming one of the most powerful men in the realm by augmenting several of his key-statistics to near-immortal levels.
Sully Sneed, now calling himself Sinister Seed somehow increased his powers to the point that of badass status and beyond in a very short amount of time. Among the stat increases were a +4 to Intelligence and un-godly charisma increase to put him well above a score of 20 in territory with that of the male super model.
"I can only say that it feels good to finally be where I am at." Seed told a local reporter on Sunday night. "Where I was, was far away but I am here now. You and I, we are in now now. This change of mine will make a difference in our realm and as my power grows so will the cold darkness that I spread with my touch."
"The Mage's Guild is just a drop in the bucket, my first rule of many on the steps to domination." Seed said. "In the coming months I am looking at an increase of +5 to my dexterity and beyond anything you have ever seen for constitution. No one can kill me now but after that, no one will really be able to kill me."
When asked if Seed was doing this to get back at the world for picking on him for being a skinny, no-talent hack, he only responded with a sniffle and cry for his mommy.
Experts agree that this power surge of Seed's is not over and that it was something he has been planning for a long time. Many suspect until he has the most hit points in the realm he will not
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rest, and that even when he does, he will not rest.
"This is a very bold move on Seed's part." Chaotic-evil expert and member of the Assassins Guild, Bobby Dead said. "What many people don't understand is that charisma is the prime stat of a chaotic evil executive, he didn't do this just to get the women but to enhance his chaotic badass side. This makes him a very powerful man now, but once he starts building up those experience points he will be well on his way to becoming the Dark Lord."
While few question the power that Seed's now holds, many want to know how he came about this power in such a short time. They also worry of a trend starting where everyone will start this stat increase in trying to one-up the person next to them in a quest to be the most powerful.
One Santa Clause DM, who asked that we keep his identity hidden, had this to say: "We have always been around, its not like we are new to the scene or anything, its just that for the most part people don't really have the desire to become a Dark Lord. The majority of people will just bump up the stats for menial things, like kicking up the charisma so they can sleep with the hot chicks, or more dexterity to the point where they get the stealth augment and can now go into the woman's shower without being seen."
"But this guy, this guy is sick." The DM added. "Though I'm not too worried about him, if he was smart he just would have maxed out all his stats at one time."
Only time will tell if soon we will be ruled by some Dark Lord bent on our destruction, or several hundred who read this article and decided they like the idea. Either way, I see a cold, dark future for us all but that is no reason for any of us to ever give up that dream of achieving badass status.
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By TERA DESTRE
Not only have more Drow been seen around town of late but a recent Watch report shows that 20 of them were found viciously murdered. They had been stripped of all weapons and laid out in a neat row in the middle of the street. Some of the bodies were torn nearly in two!
The report claims the Watch is uncertain just what kind of man or beast could have performed this vile act and that so far this seems to be a random incident. One source I spoke with, that prefers to remain nameless, speculated that it may have something to do with the four portals that have appeared in different districts in town in the last couple of days but would not comment further on the mysterious portals.
This reporter went to where one of the portals is located and felt the presence of evil and a beckoning so strong that I will admit I turned tail and ran! Anyone having more information on these portals please contact me, or any other Oracle reporter, so that the rest of our readers can be kept informed.
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Wanna get drunk? Wanna get real drunk? Wanna get that way fast?
Like it smooth? Like it real smooth? Like it when it just eases down your throat in a smooth caress?
Well I got just the thing for you! I make it myself and I don't charge much for it either. For 1 silver a jar you too can have the drunken night of your life. Or get that woman or man you've had your eye on drunk enough that they will be seeing you in a whole new way!
Moonshine by the jar is what I'm selling. To get yours just leave your order for Tera Destre La Fontaine at the Red Dragon Inn.
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By TERA DESTRE
According to witnesses, Ryo Tosaga and Kai Inuyasha, not more than two days ago in the Red Dragon's Great Hall the Mazoku demon calling itself, Kibi Sarawatari Ayumi again attacked an innocent woman, Mishi Kira Jaiobi, attempting to kill them out of revenge.
This time the Mazoku who this reporter was told is not as particularly nasty as other demons due to her having actually been fully human up until about a year ago went for a full on frontal attack using her sword on the unsuspecting Mishi who stated that she has no idea why she was the focus of this attack.
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The other two that this reporter interviewed were not as hesitant with their answers on this still developing story and freely offered that the demon was out for revenge against Mishi's current boyfriend, Snake Lionheart, who had attempted to kill her days earlier.
Snake happened to be present at the time of this vicious attack on his girlfriend, Mishi, and saved the day by killing the demon Kibi. However none of the three people in the Great Hall during this interview are certain that RhyDin has seen the last of the Kibi demon as, according to Ryo, this is the fourth time that she has been killed.
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